2.26.2007

Cabby

My cab driver this morning asked me:

“why do you come to America? All the money in the world is in Saudi”

With a “I really think you are an unappreciative dumb-ass” look.

I told him that I already have all the money in the world and handed him my credit card.

was that mean?

Goodbye, my friend.
12:05 PM
0 commented

2.23.2007

Relax....it's just Words

"Homesickness is... absolutely nothing. Fifty percent of the people in the world are homesick all the time... You don't really long for another country. You long for something in yourself that you don't have, or haven't been able to find."

-- John Cheever

"Why shouldn't I work for the NSA? That's a tough one. But I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at the NSA, and somebody puts a code on my desk, somethin' no one else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, cus' I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East and once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels are hiding... Fifteen hundred people that I never met, never had no problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, Send in the marines to secure the area" cus' they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, cus' they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie over there takin' shrapnel in the ass. He comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, cus' he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so that we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the little skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. They're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, of course, maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and fuckin' play slalom with the icebergs, it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work. He can't afford to drive, so he's walking to the fuckin' job interviews, which sucks because the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' cus' every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fuck it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected President"

~Will from Good Will Hunting

Goodbye, my friend.
11:57 AM
0 commented

2.21.2007

Overheard in the Mall of America

Middle-aged woman with children yelling into a cell phone: This is very important! We lost Grandma!

Goodbye, my friend.
12:52 PM
0 commented

2.18.2007

Hidden Magic

TONS of high quality olive oil sautéed garlic

Fresh tomatoes

Slat

Pepper

[pita bread]

Don’t ask questions

Goodbye, my friend.
1:36 AM
0 commented

DRAIN ME ALL YOU WANT

I LOVE MY FRIGGIN PAPI!!!!!

Goodbye, my friend.
1:29 AM
0 commented

uhmmm

why do you fart more as you grow older?

Goodbye, my friend.
12:31 AM
0 commented

2.16.2007

What PizzaMen Talk About When They Talk About Delivering Pizzas

Here's an excerpt of a phone conversation I recently had with "The Snake", a fellow pizzaman:

Snake: "Dude, guess where I delivered to tonight?"

PizzaMan: Where?"

S: The apartment where I lost my virginity"

PM: "Nice. What was the story? Who lives there now?"

S: "It was the total classic delivery, two dudes, totally baked out of their minds. They came to the door and I was like 'Hey, pizza's here' and they were like 'Sweet!' and I was like 'You know what else is sweet? This is the apartment I lost my virginity in."

PM: "What did they say to that?"

S: "They were cool about it. The one dude asked which bedroom, I pointed to it and the other dude was like 'YES!'"

PM: "That's pretty good. I had a delivery kind of like that, recently"

S: "Oh yeah? Where?"

PM: "Remember Amy and Jenny's place? The place where they had that one party?"

S: "Yeah".

PM: "Yeah, that place. I delivered there the other night and when the guy came to the door, I said 'Dude, I've had sex in this apartment'".

S: "What did he say?"

PM: "He said 'Me too!'"

S: (laughs) "Sweet!"

PM: "Then we high-fived."

S: "Nice"

Goodbye, my friend.
1:44 PM
1 commented

2.13.2007

Hello - Kal

It's me ....Punkin

Well, it looks like it's getting warmer a bit and some light is showing at the end of this Minnesota tunnle. What will you do when it hits 40 degrees again?

I think I'll go buy a Honeydew Melon and eat it alone and then make a huge bowl of white wine Sangria ! Drink some and make some popsicles for an afternoon snack.

Goodbye, my friend.
10:40 AM
0 commented

2.09.2007

Clippy - GONE

R.I.P CLIPPY!!

Goodbye, my friend.
5:27 PM
0 commented

2.08.2007

Pretty Randomness

- I had a dream last night that it snowed in:

- I asked my boyfriend last night to stop making me lunches to take to work because that made me feel "less independent". It was a stupid fucking idea.

- there is beauty in watching a guy in his early 20's and winter gear, a messenger bag in one hand and a book in the other, walking up steps of his snow covered parents house.

- I like Wyzata : with its hilly housing, randomly scattered skating rinks, curved roads and beautiful men.

- if you skip work to stalk someone who barely knows who you are, is that like really bad..?!@?

Goodbye, my friend.
10:13 AM
1 commented

2.06.2007

Perfect Party Cake--Googly Madonna

Perfect Party Cake--Googly Madonna
Originally uploaded by curtprins.

God Bless My Boyfriend and My Friend!!
Please all, pray to her holyness a nice win!!

Goodbye, my friend.
1:39 PM
0 commented

poem

I wrote this poem with hope that it comforts whoever reads it in those gruelingly freezing days.

"WINTER"
by Punkin

SHIT!
It's Cold!

Goodbye, my friend.
9:49 AM
1 commented

2.03.2007

nice!!

Hidden Facts Overdose